An Ode to 22

With the realization that the month of May is now looming closely to the scene I had a scary thought, that in less than two months I would turn 23, an age that I cannot possibly yet accept as I still have not entirely accepted that I've been 22 for almost a whole year! I know it's just a number and as I transcend the boundary between the two numbers nothing will change me as a person, but I still didn't like it, for me it represented everything I comparatively hadn't done or hadn't got yet; a career, a family, a serious boyfriend, money...in many ways my life profile read something like a high school drop-out's would, apart from the fact that I had a useless education. Being 22 had been hard, it was the age I graduated from school and ultimately and against my own will, became a part of the grown up world of employment, debt and singleton living. It was the age I got my first dog, my first full-time job, my first council tax bill...but was that it? So what now? I thought plans would fall into place and my graduate life would be like a movie where the geeky girl finally blossoms and gets the handsome guy, the dream job and the life-long lesson...but so far I've done none of that. I suppose instead of bottling these questions up, I hope that other people my age are feeling the same way and asking some of the same questions about their own direction in life. If so then perhaps reading that someone else is in the same rocky boat would be comforting...or maybe I'm just thinking too much!
For all the non-Edinburgians out there (yes I made up that word!) it has been very windy in Edinburgh for a while. In fact I think I'm getting used to the perpetual forceful winds blowing the dry ends of my hair against my numb face like razors! Bob Dylan said that the answer is in the wind,blowing in the wind, and if that were true then there would be a lot of unseen nebulous answers around here. In literature windy weather often means a vast change is approaching, maybe a storm...but who knows because at this age life is so unpredictable. Now more than ever I really miss knowing what I'll be doing next year, or even next week...Septembers full of new beginnings; school, friends, teachers...July, the beginning of a forever summer - the best times of your life. But it is still April, I still have time...